Sunday, December 30, 2012

Twins of Faith 2012


Hmm.. I really don't know how to begin...

The talks yesterday were AMAZING.
MashaAllah. Tabarakallah..

We learned many new things, as well as 'reminded' of learnED lessons.. 
SubhanAllah.. To compare to HIS VASTNESS of knowledge, of course, the knowledge we learned was INsignificant-nothing to the eyes of Allah, The One whose knowledge occupies more than 7 seas.. But to us human beings with limited knowledge and capacity, it was A LOT to digest and implement. A LOT enough to hold us accountable in the day of judgement, in front of Allah.. (Scary~)


What's better than talking, learning about Allah?
HIS attributes: MERCY, love, forgiveness.. 
HIS promises: Rewards in Jannah, severe punishments in hellfire, the day of judgement, life in dunya and grave..


Amazing how HE is being PATIENT with us even though we forget HIM sometimes, even sinning, disobeying HIM (YA Rabb, i'm ashamed of myself thinking of this. Pls conceal them in this dunya and herafter).. A man could get tired of us when we keep doing something he dislikes. Yes, understood. I mean, who would want to be there when we terribly frustrate and disappoint others? Even if it was by accident, who would be patient enough for the second-third-fourth-infinity-times? (Wa 'iyadzhubillah, may Allah beautify our akhlaq and make us patient and reward us). I can understand that. And we-ourselves get devastated too when we keep falling into committing the same mistakes, the same sins tho' we've tried so hard.. Then we get tired sometimes to keep moving, going. And there were times, we quit, gave up, as we see people around us had also given up on us.. Yes, it's painful. No one's around to hold you, nor to help you to put the broken parts and pieces of you all together-again.

But guess what? Allah, al Ghafuur and ar Rahim never gets tired of us. Nor does HE abandones us. HE  will never leave us as long as we keep trying, no matter how hard it is to keep going. HE forgives and forgets.. 

It puts me to tears to see a mother, with a smile, encouraging her small child to keep standing on her feet to learn to walk. And every time this child fell, she held her hands to stand again, and let her go-NOT TO abandon her, but to let her learns on her own while she assists and waits patiently.. The small child must have given up few times, but because this small innocent child knows her mother is THERE for her to support and help, she pushes herself further to keep trying ! 

Now, how about Allah? The One who spreads only 1% of HIS mercy on this earth, the same kind of mercy that HE showed through this mother, is now keeping with HIM another 99% ?!

Ya Rabb.. Let us not fall into despair.. Pls have mercy upon us all...

Allah will be with you.. He keeps forgiving our sins- HE WAITS US at the door of taubah 24/7.
As long as you don't give up upon yourself and keep having faith (iman)..

All this clears your mind, your thoughts..
Which we hope to lead us to act righteously..
Aiming for HIS mercy and to be able to meet, talk, see HIM..

Face the brutal facts

Talking about who Allah IS.. SubhanAllah.. It breaks me!
Ya Allah, i feel so dumb. Astaghfirullah..
Why do we keep forgetting You?
What puts us away from Your remembrance?
What hinders us from worshiping you well?
What stops us from getting up in the middle of the night and cries to you, begs you for Jannatul firdausil A'la?
Why are we soooo distracted?

*Boy oh boy. Am angry with myself*

WAKE UP.. Face the brutal facts.
Look at yourself.
Look at your progression in terms of your deen.
Look at how you live your life.
Look at how you spend the blessings Allah gives you.
What are you doing??
(Yes you! Who writes this!)

I had a hard-BIG slap in the face when Syaykh Abdurrahman Green told us how we youth today had been wasting our time on facebook, tweets and other social networking- how we are not using our time to maximum to benefit our dunya and akhira- not reaching our FULL potential. And he addressed our attitudes- taking our youth, all the blessings for granted. (Shame on you, ya ukhty) He continued saying, for certainty, we will regret in our older age for wasting our time and not spending equal(or more) time striving to learn Islamic knowledge as much as we are eager to learn secular knowledge..

Yes, FB and tweets are fun but don't waste our time there when we can actually spend our time for something beettteeeer which promises us GREATER rewards! Use them wisely, as ONLY a tool to achieve our LONG-TERM goals..

And all the engaging talks on the lives of habeebuna Muhammad (salallahu 'alayh wasalam) and his companions (radiyallahu 'anhum). We learned GREAT lessons from their lives! And you just can't have enough of them. They seemed so REAL to me, so dear.. SubhanAllah.. As if i was witnessing what they were doing...

Ya Rabb.. How much i miss them..

Hm.. Not my first time attending all these iman-boosting talks, seminars, courses and conferences tho'.. 
A good question to ask myself now, 
"How much have i implemented knowledge learned in my life?
How much have i benefited myself, my family and people around me with the knowledge i have?"

Ya Rabb, make us all among people of action like Prophet Muhammad (salallahu 'alayh wasalam), his companions, wives and all the people of the first generation of Al-Quran..
May Allah grant us eagerness to learn and live by the teachings of Al-Quran and As-Sunnah solely for HIS sake, to search for HIS countenance (face) in the day of judgement..

Read More......

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Ya Rabb.. I learn my lesson..



Hope all of us are in the best state of iman and health.

May Allah guide us and keep assisting us in HIS guidance.
May Allah help us to keep our intention right, pure, sincere for HIS sake
and that our action is in accordance to the teachings of Prophet Muhammad salallahu 'alayh wasalam..

Aaaaamin. :)

I had a thought shared via fb today. So i was thinking of sharing it here, too.

Here it goes:

I realize such a not-so-cute (trying to avoid using 'stupid' here LOL) mistake i made for not clarifying things before making a decision. Btw, on what basis did i make the decision upon- on assumptions?

Astaghfirullah.. Fear Allah ukhty.. :( 

We might think event x happens there, when event y is actually taking place. The problem comes when we don't clarify on what's really going on there.. And the danger comes when we start to believe on the should-be-justified-and-clarified assumption we made..

Trust me, things are usually A LOT different than what we assume or think.

Be truthful to yourself by asking and clarifying.

Don't make a judgement and assumption beforehand..

Avoid suspicion now, as we might fall into backbiting later..

Wa na'uzhubillah..

يأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ اجْتَنِبُواْ كَثِيراً مِّنَ الظَّنِّ إِنَّ بَعْضَ الظَّنِّ إِثْمٌ وَلاَ تَجَسَّسُواْ وَلاَ يَغْتَب بَّعْضُكُم بَعْضاً أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتاً فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ وَاتَّقُواْ اللَّهَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ تَوَّابٌ رَّحِيمٌ

O you who believe! Avoid much suspicion; indeed some suspicion is sin. And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother You would hate it. And have Taqwa of Allah. Verily, Allah is the One Who forgives and accepts repentance, Most Merciful..

Read More......

Monday, December 24, 2012

HE breaks to make



I'm writing this with a crying heart..
But, i'm very proud to say that;
At least,
i'm writing this with a heart of full tawakkul on HIM..

Yes. Full tawakkul on Allah.

Letting go a thing that is very dear to you..
Which you once thought you possessed it.
Which you thought it was ALL yours..

That's the mistake i made.
To think it was ALL mine.
Now HE takes it back.
HE breaks it.
To make you realize you own NOTHING.
It was ALL HIS.

Ya Rabb, why didn't i see this?

Waiting for HIM to break
to come to realize this?
How frustrating is that?
Needing Allah to 'knock' your head out
to come to realize this?
Uhuh, how shameful is that?

Ya Rabb, i must have been so heedless,
for not paying attention to this;
that i let a person to take place in this sick heart.
SICK heart, which in need of ALLAH even more.

Ya Allah, pls forgive me.
I'm letting this go for Your sake.
Pls don't forsaken me.

Guide our way.
Mend our heart.
Place mercy.
Increase blessings.

*You will never realize how much a blessing means until you lose it*

I can understand now how Muaz (radiyallahu 'anh) felt when he had to depart from most beloved person to his heart (and ours inshaAllah), Prophet Muhammad salallahu 'alayh wasalam.. To go to Yemen. He was crying all his way to Yemen.. He was a man in hurt- pain to leave..

Pls remember me in your du'a,
Pls make dua that Allah will gather us all in Jannah, close to these beloved people, the first geberation of Al-Quran..
And that Allah will save us from the fitan of the grave and hereafter, away from hellfire..


Read More......

Friday, December 14, 2012

Marriage In The Shade of Al Quran


Assalamu'alaykum 'O beoble (people) :)

Here interesting notes, interesting enough to be shared, inshaAllah :


"This ummah will never get straight if the marriages don't start right" -Da'ee Ahmed Moait

Human beings by nature love who benefits them. 
If the hearts are full of the love of this dunya, the aim for marriage will be solely for dunya.
If the hearts are full of the love of Allah and Rasulullah (salallahu 'alayh wasalam), the choice will be easier- no distraction)

You choose: Do you 
want to get married to be CURSED by Allah?
Or to be BLESSED by Allah?

Marry a person who can bring you closer to Allah.

Marry for the sake of Allah.
Share the love of Allah.

Don't tailor-make your destiny.

Ask Allah, have iman.
Believe in HIS choice.

Be a believer, Allah will give you someone HE loves

"Get married, to support, not to burden each other"

"Your husband (or wife), is your JANNAH or JAHANNAM"

'Marriage in The Shade of Al Quran' by Daiee Ahmed Moait
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Wednesday, October 31, 2012

RM5? Wallahi it was nothing !

I had an intention this morning to do sadaqah.

"Where can i ever find a miskin or a faqir here in my university?.."

Recalling on a tafseer i had on Juz 'Amma, Allah encourages us to give to the poor, needy, not just anyone around us- our friends or family members who are well fed and sustained..

I stepped out of my room, made the dua and still having the lecture on stories of ahadeeth fresh in mind (yet to be digested by the level of the understanding of the heart). I was listening to it while getting ready to class. It was talking about sadaqah and death..

Ever wondered, why people hate death so much? In fact, many try to avoid the fact that everyone shall one day die..

A muslim scholar during the time of Umayyah once explained how can a person think of or love death when their pursue in their whole life is building their dunya forgetting akhira. And how can they ever love death , return to akhira and meet Allah when all these will just destroy what they are accumulating and building in dunya?

Let me put it this way:
'We work soooooo hard to build this dunya, destroy the akhira.
Now, how can we possibly leave what is built to what is destroyed?' (Re-quoting the speaker)


Wallahi, we haven't worked hard enough to build a castle in Jannah.
Not hard enough to compare to our strive, our effort in building a castle in this dunya !

Ok. Make sure i strive harder for the akhira more than what i'm working on for the dunya. So that i feel nothing to leave what i have in this dunya while feeling so excited to get what's there in the hereafter ! InshaAllah will work on this, harder.

.... Then i realized i gotta walk faster, couldn't afford to lose the bus as i couldn't walk to the kuliyyah, it's too far. I couldn't walk much- a ni'mah that Allah took away from me recently, good health. SubhanAllah..

As i was trying to cross the road, i saw the bus, it was about to leave soon!

And yea, it did, right after i crossed the road........!

Aaaaa........ (T_T)
Ok. Stop complaining. Be EARLIER next time. InshaAllah..

Saw a taxi passed by right in front of me.
I wasn't late tho but i dun want to b waiting for uncertainty- when will the next bus arrive? Allahua'alam.

I stopped the taxi.
He asked me where to go.
The uncle (driver) looked a bit reluctant when i said to my kuliyyah.
But he somehow let me in.
It was then i discovered that he was in rush too !
And he reminded me to make sure i have small change..
I opened my purse and as i'd expected, i didn't have any :(

The uncle was very kind, he said that i don't have to pay anythg then, he'll just send me.
Wallahi, that was't helping, i felt HORRIBLE.
Taking his time for free?
Oh no.
No no no..

We reached the place and i told him to wait for just a moment and rushed to nearest shop to get a smaller change.


I knocked the window, he opened it and i handed RM5 note to him.

"Uncle, just take this, i don't have any smaller money. Pls. Gotta rush to class"

He happily, excitedly shouted "This is a lot ! Oh thank you !"

(Our conversations were in Malay- here translated)

A lot?
I was so shock to his response.
Wallahi, RM5 is a lot?
I needed to pay him only RM3.10 actually, but really, i had only few RM50 notes with me.

While walking to my class, i was crying, thinking how insignificant RM5 is to compare to what Allah had prepared in the hereafter to HIS faithful and obedient servants..


Ya Allah, i regret. 
Next time i should just give the RM50. What's there to be afraid of to lose? :(
Read More......

Friday, October 19, 2012

Stay away !

I was so amazed with the hadeeth shared by ustaz in our halaqah tonight, when he mentioned hudzhaifah once explained to Umar the great fitan which will be faced by the muslims one day (Read: muslims here is referrring to us) involving wealth, family, children and more..

Then i started to realize how much have i been distracted with so many things in life.
So distracting that i realized some of them bring me away from Allah.

None contributing to my knowledge.
None strengthening my iman.
Nor increasing my taqwa..

Most severe, none of these 'few' draw me closer to Allah and the teachings of my beloved Prophet Muhammad (saw/pbuh)..

I admit, i myself being tested with one (or more- yet for me to realize/ discover) of these great fitan.

Advice to myself: cut all the ropes to all these useless 'rubbish' in life. :(

Allahul musta'an.

May Allah protect me from things that displease HIM.
May Allah give us strength to act upon what HE is pleased with, the most.
May Allah forgive all of our sins.


Khalas, No more.
I want things to be pleasing to Allah, even if they appeared desirable.
Allah's and HIS messenger's pleasure is my PRIORITY. 
Read More......

Wednesday, September 19, 2012



Sharing this heart-moving article written by our great and beloved scholar (may Allah bless his soul. Amin)
As if he understood us well, subhanAllah.

May Allah make us all among the 1st type of youth.

Dilemma Facing The Youth

A glance at the youthIf we closely exam the the youth, it will be possible for us to conclude that the youth are generally of three types: Rightly guided youth, deviated or perverted youth and youth who are confused (between evil and good).
Read More......

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Who's approval?

How happy a person may be for having his/her parents' approval of the spouse to be..
So happy that he/she may feel like telling and sharing the news with everyone !
Btw, why wouldn't he?
Why wouldn't she?

After all this while,
After all the struggles he/she might have had, to convince the parents to understand and accept...

Who wouldn't he or she feel happy? :)

AS i was pondering, i was thinking to myself this;
if that person could be so happy to have the MOST important person's approval to what is so dear to his/her heart, HOW ABOUT ALLAH? How would we feel if we get the approval from HIM to all that we do?

Have i made this my 'THE-most' thing to be concerned of?..


The best approval and most-worthy one to seek for- Allah's approval.

Does Allah approve this?
Does Allah like this for me?
Is Allah happy with me?

Oo Allah, let our concern be seeking your pleasure-the most. Amin..
Read More......

Monday, August 20, 2012

Brother Eddie from "The Deen Show" Exclusive in-depth interview at Andal...



I got so inspired with his story.
Hoping that it will do so to you too!
InshaAllah :)

With so much love and PEACE
Umm Teem <3 p="p">
Read More......

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Mufti Menk - Fight The Shaitaan! || Funny*

Wudhu? Check.
Awrah properly covered? Check.
Al-Quran brought? Check.
More and more and more in the Ramadhan-to-do list. BIG check.

Ok. I'm ready. InshaAllah!

Read More......

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Knowledge - Mufti Menk


It's a great blessing to acquire beneficial knowledge.
Also a TEST.

A test for scholars and students of knowledge to practice and teach.

A test for layman to respect the knowledge these people have (at least) if one couldn't have respect towards them.

We sometimes easily condemn scholars for their shortcomings, especially in regards to their worldly affairs. They are human beings, too. Our job is to advice, help and support them in worldly matter which they are lack of (if there's any).

Don't overlook the fact that they are blessed and chosen by Allah to have the religious knowledge. Not everyone is blessed with sound knowledge these people have.

*Ever wondered how can Prophet Muhammad (s) who was illiterate has most knowledge? SubhanAllah..*


Read More......

Friday, May 18, 2012

Struggles We Face

These videos are enough to express the struggles most of us are facing today..

Ya Rabb..
Please forgive us for our heedlessness.
A sin of ours doesn't worth a distance it creates between You and us ya Allah..
Guide us and please have mercy upon us.
It's Your mercy that brought us here today..

Cure to Laziness and Idleness in Seeking Knowledge

Soldier of Allah- Act Like One!

Read More......

Monday, May 14, 2012

Oo Allah, I'm So Sorry

"I'm not gonna do that again!"

With full determination, telling myself that last night. And alhamdulillah, i did it- removed -hoping to leave it for the sake Allah, and hoping that Allah will replace it with something better. inshaAllah..

It all started last night, after the talk, on our way back, few dear sisters of mine started singing hindi's song.
Gotta break it, or else we all mighht get carried away from the remembrance of Allah!

So i started reciting few aayat from The Quran loud enough for them to hear.
Crazy thing to do but it worked. *yezza*

Then a friend who walked beside me paused. Others continued walking in front of me, still not noticing.. Huhu

"How do people recite Al-Quran with rythm?" she asked.

I startled. Thinking of what to answer her.

"Leave music. Read more Quran. Get used to listening to more than one qari" i answered her simple..

In my head, recalling my struggle leaving music few years ago, alhamdulillah. Allah gave me strength to do so, and it was made easy upon me by the mercy of Allah.

Listening to music take up so much time. We read less Quran than listen to music.

"It's hard, i know, but that's the test. You wanted to leave what displeases HIM and turn to what pleases HIM, ask Allah to make it easy upon you, but of course, you should expect HIM to test you a bit.." I said to her, with an encouraging smile.

"Guess i have to hang around more with you girls.." She seemed to be in deep thought, lost in her own world.

Understood her feelings, i said "We all need each other, to improve.."

Both lost in our world of thoughts, walking straight to masjid. 

*we went to pray for isyak pretty late. Hate it. Guess they are all tired of hearing me complaining "Hey we haven't prayed!* every less than 10 min throughout the night after the talk ends! Heee.. Done it with purpose. Yea we were the committees for the program but we should really rush to prayers. Sorry girls, i couldn't stand waiting..Huhu*

In Masjid:

Everyone's pushing each other to become imamah to lead the prayer. Fine. For more rewards, i gave in.

*humm.. common scene..*

"Ukhty, recite 'nuurun 'ala nuur'.." A friend requested. SubhanAllah. i miss that ayah..

The prayer went on until.....



"Allah is the Light of the heavens and the earth. The example of His light is like a niche within which is a lamp, the lamp is within glass, the glass as if it were a pearly [white] star lit from [the oil of] a blessed olive tree, neither of the east nor of the west, whose oil would almost glow even if untouched by fire. Light upon light. Allah guides to His light whom He wills. And Allah presents examples for the people, and Allah is Knowing of all things.." [An-Nuur: 35]


Then the ayah hit me..

" . Light upon light. Allah guides to His light whom He wills. And Allah presents examples for the people, and Allah is Knowing of all things.. "

Allah.. it's by your mercy that i'm standing here today. By your mercy that you guided me to here today. SubhanAllah..

Felt so ashamed. 
How could we sinning after all these blessings bestowed from HIM upon us?

Felt so ashamed. Shouldn't we? 
Standing in front of HIM, The Merciful One and Forgiving, concealing our sins in people's eyes that they see only good things from you?. 
Thinking of the sins we committed not wanting people to know, but forgetting HE KNOWS?..

I knew exactly the one i did. 
That's the moment i realized and told to myself, "i'm not gonna di it again. Ever."

The prayer continued to 2nd rakaah until..

يأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ لِمَ تَقُولُونَ مَا لاَ تَفْعَلُونَ 
"O you who believe! Why do you say that which you do not do"

كَبُرَ مَقْتاً عِندَ اللَّهِ أَن تَقُولُواْ مَا لاَ تَفْعَلُونَ 
"Most hateful it is with Allah that you say that which you do not do.."

[As-Saff: 2-3]

How can we tell people not to do somethg but we are the one who's committing it. Hey, again, Allah knows aite? 

*Haaaa... I felt like the ayah spoke directly to me.. (T__T)*


Oo Allah.. I'm so sorry. I  promise i will not do that again. Plz give me patience and replace it with something better.

Jannah isn't cheap. It has a PRICE needing us to pay. 

But i'm buying. Trying to reach the price.

"We are yet to make Allah's happy with us
Syaykh Tawfique Chowdury-Twins of Faith Dec 2011 Conference.

Oo Allah, please be happy with me.
Protect me from things that You hate.
Grant me taqwa.
Grant me furqaan..

يِـأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ إَن تَتَّقُواْ اللَّهَ يَجْعَل لَّكُمْ فُرْقَانًا وَيُكَفِّرْ عَنكُمْ سَيِّئَاتِكُمْ وَيَغْفِرْ لَكُمْ وَاللَّهُ ذُو الْفَضْلِ الْعَظِيمِ
"O you who believe! If you obey and fear Allah, He will grant you Furqan, and will expiate for you your sins, and forgive you; and Allah is the Owner of the great bounty" [Al-Anfal:29]

`Furqan': `criterion between truth and falsehood'. (Muhammad bin Ishaq)

Certainly, those who have Taqwa of Allah by obeying what He ordained and abstaining from what he forbade, will be guided to differentiate between the truth and the falsehood. This will be a triumph, safety and a way out for them from the affairs of this life, all the while acquiring happiness in the Hereafter. They will also gain forgiveness, thus having their sins erased, and pardon, thus having their sins covered from other people, as well as, being directed to a way to gain Allah's tremendous rewards,"

Excerpts of aayat of Al-Quran above are taken from

*Deactivated FB temporarily- to rest*
Read More......

Monday, March 26, 2012

'ROJAK' post to remind the heedless-me

(Konon semangat)

Assalamu'alaykum.. (Jawab penuh: Wa'alaikumussalam wrm wbt= more rewards)

Emo sekarang: Rasa KOSONG. Teruknya!!

Time2 ni la iman nak jatuh menjunam..... Mcm xda tanda nak naik. Hish. Dah bape hari dah ni.

"Assalamu'alaykum fai.. Kaif haluk? Nak mtak nasihat dr sahabat lama kalau x keberatan.. :)"

Tit tit. (mesej masuk. Uhuk. HP 'comel'. Bunyi pun comel la. Ayah x kasi beli HP mahal+canggih. My uncle called me 'Gadget Destroyer'. Huhu)

Alih perhatian dari novel di tgn-'Versus' by hlovate ke HP comel. (Erk.Ape la demam tetiba bc novel. X lyn sgt tp novel ni bgus gak. Mcm bule relate byk dgn watak2 dlm novel ni.. MACAM bule relate.. Ni yg rasa mcm nak salahkan sorang rommate ni, baik betul dia kenalkan novel ni! Dah tu diri sendiri tanya, konon nak survey novel best utk kakak. Alih2 diri sendiri melekat)

Sahabat lama: ,"Wa'alaikumussalam. Alhamdulillah (Di dlm hadis Qudsi, riwayat Ahmad, Allah berfirman. Allah berfirman "Wahai anak Aadam, jika engkau mengingat Aku dlm dirimu maka Aku akn mengingatimu dlm Diriku..")

Tit tit. (Lagi mesej masuk)
"Rasulullah (saw) membezakan manusia di dalam hadisnya yg berbunyi org yg berzikir dgn org x berzikir ibarat org hidup dan org mati..' Ibn Taymiyah r.a. berkata "zikir bg seorg mukmin, bgaikan ikan dan air. Bgmanakah keadaan ikan bila ia dipisahkan dgn air?"

Fuh. Pedih. Direct masuk hati.

Tit tit. (More messages coming in-inbox penuh.Uhuk)

"Rujuklah kembali pd al-quran..surah ali imran yg bermula dri ayat 133 & seterusnya"

Apa lagi. Mana translation Quran!!

"Dan bersegeralah kamu mencari ampunan dari Tuhanmu dan mendapatkan surga yang luasnya seluas langit dan bumi yang disediakn bagi orang-orang yang bertaqwa (ayat 133)
...........dan (juga) orang-orang yang apabila mengerjakan perbuatan keji atau menzalimi diri sendiri. (segera) mengingati Allah, lalu memohon ampunan atas dosa-dosanya, dan siapa (lagi) yang dapat mengampuni dosa-dosa-dosa selain Allah? Dan mereka tidak meneruskan perbuatan dosa itu sedang mereka mengetahui..(ayat 135)"

Tetiba teringat kat Syaykh Reda Bedeir last time dtg Malaysia bagi talk: "Rush to The Forgiveness of Allah"
Haaaa... Macam tahu je apa masalah hati ini sekarang. Macam dah terjawab. (O Allah, sorry!)

Tit tit. (Ada lagi)

"Hati yg resah & gelisah, boleh jadi kerana ia merindukan pda Allah namun dihalangi dgn perbuatan maksiat yg dilakukan xpa disedari.."

"Jagalah matamu krna itulh pintu yg paling luas & paling mudah utk dimasuki anasir maksiat..kesannya akn memberi tempias pd hati..sentiasa menjga hati dgn perbykkan istighfar yg benar.. halusi mknanya.. yakini dgn hati yg tawadu' memohon pd Allah.."

Hmm.. Tawadu... Ya Allah! Adab dgn Allah pun x settle lagi. Ibadah hati..

Balas: "SubhanAllah.. Xtaw nak ckp pe. *hati tesentuh. Rindukan peringatan*"

Ye. Sebak sgt. Rindukan hati yg dulunya sentiasa 'basah' , hidup mengingati Allah.
Sekarang? Lain. Mungkin terlalu sibuk dgn hal duniawi yg melalaikan..

"Org yg beriman itu sunatullahnya akn terus menerus diuji Allah. bgmana mungkin kamu dikatakan beriman jika tidak diuji.. (29:2-3)

Sebak. Sahabat bilik sorang ni pulak baca Al-Quran gaya ala2 Ziyad Patel. Dah macam 'background music', cuma bukan music, skali Quranic Recitation da.. Haru.....

Tit tit. (Mesej masuk lagi)

"InsyaAllah, setiap mukmin itu memerlukan peringatan..dan Allah itu Maha Pengampun & Maha Penyayang pada hamba2Nya.. (39:53 & seterusnya) Sama2lah kita saling memperingati.."


My mood now: Malu. Malu dengan Allah..

Pikir.. Pikir..

"We are yet to make Allah happy with us"
-Syaykh Tawfique Chowdury (TOF Conference, Malaysia. Dec 2011)

Ya Allah, pelihara hati ini.
Ya Mu'min, I wana have sound and and healthy heart. Amin.

A post for the now-heedless me.
Allahu yahdina.

With so much love and peace,
Umm Teem.
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Thursday, February 9, 2012

When times were bad

When times were bad..

Who was the FIRST that you turned to?

When times were HARD..
And that you needed someone to HOLD to,
to COMFORT you..

Who was the first that you turned to?

Can you recall?

My dear brothers and sisters,
Never forget Allah in times of ease.
So that HE may be with you in times when you need HIM most.

was it Allah who you turned to, FIRST?

May nothing become CLOSEST and DEAREST to you except Allah.
And HIS messenger, Muhammad ibn Abdillah salallahu 'alayh wasalam.


قُلْ إِن كُنتُمْ تُحِبُّونَ اللَّهَ فَاتَّبِعُونِى يُحْبِبْكُمُ اللَّهُ وَيَغْفِرْ لَكُمْ ذُنُوبَكُمْ وَاللَّهُ غَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ 

"Say (O Muhammad), 'If you really love Allah, then follow me, Allah will love you and forgive you your sins. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.." 
(Ali 'imran: 31)

And Allah knows best.
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Thursday, January 26, 2012

It's My Past. No More Please


SubhanAllah.. One evening a dear friend of mine asked, with enough confusion on her face (obviously), "Why would you feel so much disturb whenever there's music playing on?"

I couldn't think of any better answer, "Because i used to love it so much"

I understand why couldn't she comprehend this 'weird' thing she found in me. Why wouldn't she feel that way anyway. In the middle of nowhere, 'those' songs were sometimes played n i couldn't sit peacefully, restless and worse i just got up and excused myself. I WALKED AWAY.

Yea.. I used to love these songs. But not anymore. Now, i HATE them.
I really hate thinking of how much had all these songs taken my time in past.
Hate thinking how much had i wasted my life
Hate thinking how much had them bring me away from spending more time seeking knowledge
Hate most thinking how much had this life of delusion taken me away from Allah- from HIS remembrance.

Life of delusion? Uhuh. Over-preoccupying my life with MUSIC. As if life is empty, null, boring without music. Sounds familiar?

*Early notification*
I'm not gonna tell you the rulings on music- prohibited or not? In what sense? Prohibited instruments, etc this time. Just clarifying my preference of Al-Quran over music. I listen to nasheed songs sometimes too, but without instruments and VERY rarely (I don't find contentment in nasheed songs though).

You see, i was raised up with music. It was was my passion, REALLY was.

My schoolmates know this well.

Wallahi i wish you girls read this post of mine. WAllahi i miss you girls.
I miss how we used to rehearse our parts (choir, singing contest) and how i used to watch you girls dancing  while waiting for my turn to practise my songs. And wanting to learn how to play piano after done practising our parts (choir) in our school mainhall.

But now, i've changed. You girls can obviously see this from me.  Wondering what happened to me, disappearing for almost 2 years then wala! Me with her big hijab after those years n now NIQAB. And guess you were shocked to discover me last time with this 'shield' on my face.

*ninja* Hoho

When Amir Muhaddith (if i spelled his name right. Known as 'Loon' before reverting to Islam, a former rapper with Bad Boys recording, used to be famous in one of his songs feat with Usher: 'I need a Girl'- again, if i spelled it right) was asked during his talk in my university to perform an 'Islamic Rap' or music or SOMETHING, he refused. He was trying to tell them not to 'bring' him back to his past life and that if possible, he would never wana go BACK to his past life- MUSIC. Wallahi i felt like he had my words! The exact spirit, 'dilemma' (perhaps. of choosing music over the beautiful words of Allah), determination (to leave music!). Imagine, it's part of your past-jahiliiyah life that you wanted so BADLY to leave for the sake of Allah and now turning your WHOLE new life to something better that is THE QURAN, beautiful words of Allah but out of a sudden, a person comes to you and telling you to 'go' back to that which you don't even want to come near to-music? And to some people, sometimes, when you tried your best to politely refuse and still they insist, that's the moment they will be shocked to see the 'weird' part of you: angry, unexplainable disturbed+mixed emotions seen obviously on your face and worst to be labelled as being extreme when you walk away. SubhanAllah..

Allah knows best that you were not trying to be rude.
Allahu yahdina.

And it was just a moment ago, i told to myself, "Oo my god, i miss to sing again".
Then i asked, "Then why are you here?"

Purpose of life?
Worship Allah. Please Allah.

Pleasing HIM. Gain knowledge to know what are the things taught in this perfect, complete and beautiful deen, understand, practice, teach and share! Keep purifying intention, actions, nafs- for HIS sake alone. InshaAllah.

What if you forget and become heedless and ignorant again? (Just in case if i do- wa'iyadzhubillah!)
Turn to HIM, seek HIS forgiveness. Ask HIM to guide you. Then leave sins. Istiqamah.
*And tell your close companions to keep reminding you*

InshaAllah.. InshaAllah..

OK. No more of those ol' days.
I found something better. And i much appreciating it n i wouldn't wana lose it- ever!
*Sweetness of Faith. Halawatul eman*


Thank you Allah :)


Why i wrote this out of a sudden? Hehe. Had Twins of Faith (TOF) conference before. Were listening to its theme song. The non-instrumental song reminded me A LOT of my prev life. Guess my iman was so low that i started to miss all those seemingly 'great' times i had with my ol' friends on the stage, rehearsing with those so called cool songs sang by 'cool' rappers n singers yet adding more misery and emptiness to the heart. Hip hop. R&B pop. And those curses in raps?  They were not cool after all..


REAL PEACE is in the remembrance of Allah.

A post to remind the-sometimes-heedless me.

With so much love and peace,
Umm Teem.
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Never will HE be injustice

Bismillah. Assalamu'alaykum..

"I hate it when my love towards HIS creation is in conflict with my love towards THE CREATOR (Allah).."

Recalling on what a very dear friend of mine once said to me.. True indeed. It leaves you a DEEP CUT to the heart when you are battling with your evil nafs which tries its best to get its place in your heart instead of leaving your heart in peace in HIS remembrance- NO conflicts. NO restlestness. NO worries. Only tranquility. Happiness. Peacefulness. Conviction. Strong faith and love to Allah.

*How easy is life if you could just be like all those superheroes shown in the scenes, where you could just fight and defeat those wicked-ugly-evil monsters and the battles just end there!*


Be real ukhty.

Well, that's how you used to see life as when you were kids. How innocent!

Allahu musta'an..

Your love towards your mom, dad, friends or anything that pleases you in this beautiful world can either be one of your best means to come closer to The Ever-Forgiving Rabb or a barrier between you and HIM. Wa'iyadzhubillah. What pain can be worse than being allieniated, away from The Forever-Needing Rabb, Allah? When HE said in HIS love letter many times to those who choose to believe, never will we be able to find other Protector, Guardian or Best Friend other than HIM. How can we still look after one other than HIM after knowing this?

Again, everything in this world, which has helped you to live your day, comes from HIM alone, The All-Sustainer and The All-Provider, Allah. They are all MEANS. Up to you now on how you 'use' them. Thanks Allah before them. All praises due to HIM. Alhamdulillah.

When things get tougher in life, know that HE who knows everything hidden and shown, small or big, is teaching you something. Because that's human, we learn best from experience. It's time to get theories into practices eyh? Sabr, syukur, redha, tawakkul, love, fear, hope. InshaAllah. Allah alone our source of guidance, strength and support. :)


They might question you lots of things. Expressing to you their concern and worries. Yes. They love and care about you. True. You are listening to them too. But not all things you can obey or follow. What's left there to obey if it contradicts to HIS obedience. Verily there's no obedience to the creations over The Creator. Yes. Thank them for their concern. Explain to them why you couldn't agree with them this time. If they resist, be patient. Hold firm to HIS rope. Innallaha ma'assobirin..

I know you love them, but i know you love Allah more. So it's your duty to please Allah while being as hikmah as possible to be nice to them.

When everyone seems not understanding you, what you are going through, nor they believe you, no worries, don't be sad, turn to Allah. He's there and will always be. InshaAllah :)

"Allah alone can mend the broken heart, He alone can bring all the broken pieces back together. That's how HE does to your broken heart. It's easy for HIM. You just need to turn back to HIM.."

Maybe i've been too far from HIM all this while. Khayr. O Allah, I'm back. (Please don't leave me!!) *emo*

Hey, Allah is testing you, grab the chance to gain more reward eyh?

All in all, never will Allah be injustice to you- Did HE ever? Nope Alhamdulillah. :)

ps: Can't help myself from being sad.. Well, i'm being human. Give yourself a break. Forgive. Leave to Allah. Just do your part. He'll take good care of you. Just as HE always do. InshaAllah..

﴿قَالَ إِنَّمَا أَشْكُو بَثِّي وَحُزْنِي إِلَى اللّهِ ..
 He said, "I only complain of my suffering and my grief to Allah , .
[Yusuf: 86]

.. فَاللَّهُ خَيْرٌ حَـفِظًا وَهُوَ أَرْحَمُ الرَحِمِينَ ﴾
.. But Allah is the Best to guard, and He is the Most Merciful of those who show mercy.''
[Yusuf: 64]

 فَاصْبِرْ إِنَّ الْعَـقِبَةَ لِلْمُتَّقِينَ ﴾
. So be patient. Surely, the (good) end is for those who have Taqwa.
[Hud: 49]

A post to heal.

With so much love and peace,
Umm Teem

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Wednesday, January 25, 2012

LOW IMAN: Switch it on!

Bismillah. Assalamu'alaykum!

Writing this post this time to remind myself first and foremost to humble down my un-resolved egoism.  SubhanAllah. There are times you know you need Allah most but sadly, sometimes we ignore the 'call' to return to HIM. Astagfirullah..

Ok. Low iman. Fine. Iman goes up and down sometimes. Roger that. So forgive yourself. Done. Know that you are not an angel, you are A HUMAN BEING. Notified. (Reality strikes. Yikes!)

You know, there are things that we know Allah and our beloved Prophet Muhammad (s) hate and that you try your best to avoid them or refrain yourself from getting indulged in. Tho' sometimes it seems sooooo hard to do so. Allahu musta'an. This is the BEST moment i'll tell myself: "Be patient my dear. Expect awesome and LOTS of rewards from your Lord!" Yeay! InshaAllah..

Free-mixing + too much music + vain talks + idol talks + backbiting + slandering, and MORE.
Astaghfirullah.. How poisonous all these could be to your eman and the soundness of your heart. Even if you are innocent, you are not committing all these sins when people surround you do, they sometimes affect you (you know how terrible and disturbed your heart feels when your friends backbite others friends of yours, etc)

*Imagining the unwashed-black-rotten-pan = colour of our sick heart*
Eeewww.. Na'udzhubillahi min dzalik!

Then.. Over a period of time, living in this kinda-sickening environment, your eman might go down (!)

And this is the moment you need something/someone to 'switch' on your eman if you couldn't reach for it (when the main switch is too high! Help me!).

Get good friends who love+fear Allah so so much to help you out. They might help you to figure out what 'poisons' have you consumed that severe your eman and suggest cure.

Or maybe it's time for you to change to new environment, do hijrah to better-friendlier one that can support you to improve yourself to better practising your deen. (But if you couldn't, fuh. Gotta fear Allah as much as you can-fear out love towards HIM! Man.. You don't wana displease HIM, do you? Wa'iyadzhubillah!)

Or start removing all those heart-aching and head-paining songs in your ipod or any mp3/mp4 player and put on eman-generating or eman-boosting lectures to get you motivated thru'out your whole day. You know, when our eman is disturbed, everything that we do seem so wrong. So fix the root cause first. InshaAllah :)

Yet, THE BEST: Al-Quran, of course. Listen, read, ponder upon its meaning.. SubhanAllah. So many 'treasures' yet to be discoevered! Dig dig dig the wisdoms and lessons learnt. Be inspired with its beauty and power of healing to any spiritual sicknesses. It works best for me so far, alhamdulillah :)

*more humble tips on getting connected to Al-Quran shared, click here *

And don't forget to make du'a to Allah. He The One who holds our heart day and night, with or without our conscientiousness (did i spell it right?), has the ability to turn and twist it. Wow, that's seriously put our head straight! Turn to HIM. Ask HIM to help you to strengthen you faith over calamities and keep it 'fresh' in thankfulness to HIM in times of ease. Have faith in HIM, inshaAllah HE will not forsake you :)

ps: Recalling on 3 things Ibn Qayyim once mentioned- that contribute most to weakness of our eman: Too much intermingling or socializing, excessive eating and excessive talking (or was it sleeping?)

O Allah... Help me to help myself to remember YOU....
*Emergency call to Allah*

So much in need of reminders,
Umm Teem
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